Stymied

***

"I hate my job."

"You do not." John sighed and idly started bouncing his knee. He was actually pretty relaxed, all things considered. Sure, his morning wasn't really going as planned, but he was supposed to have been in a meeting with Sgt. Bates half an hour ago, so he was thinking this was a bit of an upgrade. "You're just cranky."

Elizabeth, who'd been pacing the rather small confines of their currently-non-moving transporter, glared down at him and recrossed her arms. Dramatically. It was a flattering move on her part. He made sure not to smirk. He did, however, shrug and go back to bouncing his knee. It hypnotizing in a very boring way.

Wasn't hypnotizing supposed to be boring? Was it not? He didn't know.

"I can't believe we're still stuck in the transporter. We've been here for almost an hour!"

Huh. Sounded like Elizabeth was a little more nervous about this than he'd thought. He shifted in his lounged position, trying to rearrange his jacket under his tailbone. "It's not like we're hanging over an open elevator shaft or anything. Plus, we're warm. We're fine."

That got him more glaring and an extra stomp to her pacing. It was too cute for words. "We are not fine, John."

"Well, I feel okay. You're not okay?"

Apparently deciding that he really wasn't treating their dire situation - stuck between dimensions or floors or whatever mythical hoojiwatsi the transporters ran in/on/with - with the gravity deserved, Elizabeth stopped, glared some more, and... kicked him. Hard.

"Hey!" He yelped, more surprised than actually injured. Admittedly, she was wearing combat boots but a soccer player she was not. "You kicked me!"

"We are STUCK in the TRANSPORTER."

"I kind of grasped that immediately after it happened, thanks, but you kicked me! What is wrong with you? Are you claustrophobic?" He sat up straight then and rubbed at his shin. Okay, that kind of did hurt.

She did something then he'd never, ever seen her do in the three or so years he'd known her. And that was saying something, considering he'd seen her in just about every mood or situation his brain could throw out. Well, okay, not that one with the garters, but it was pretty damn hard to locate those in the Pegasus Galaxy. Plus, they weren't dating so... Fine, most every lethal situation his brain could come up with. That was strangely unfair, all things considered.

But no, this was one he'd never actually seen before. And, considering what it was, that was probably a damn good thing.

She pouted. Pitifully.

John was on his feet and hugging her immediately, with no actual recollection of even standing up.

"It'll be okay, Eliza-OW. Stop injuring me!"

"Why were you hugging me?"

He stopped rubbing his solar plexus enough to glare back at her. "You pouted! You needed comfort! Or something!"

She slapped him on the shoulder and then stamped her foot. "I wasn't pouting, I was mad!"

If his chest wasn't smarting so much from the elbow and his shin weren't hurting from the boots, he'd have found that insanely adorable too. Really, it was kind of sad how often he thought of his boss as cute.

Still, he was in pain and she kept hitting him. That had to stop.

He executed a quick foot move and turned her around so she was pressed face-first into the nearest wall, arms and legs both pinned under their combined weight. Annoyed, he whispered into her ear, "Okay, mad or not, you don't assault a military officer while having a temper tantrum."

He could almost feel her glare through the back of her head. That was really kind of impressive. Unfortunately for his credebility as a bad-ass military man, even one who was beating up on his boss, she took that opportunity to try and wiggle free. And for someone pinned against a wall, it was a rather lot of concentrated wiggle.

John was kind of insanely glad she was facing the other way and didn't get an up-close and personal experience with his sudden and complete blush. Not that she couldn't figure out why he WAS blushing - and wow, that was embarassing and entirely cliche - but still. His pride was partially salvaged.

"You're kidding me." John took it as a rather small victory that her statement came out incredulous rather than pissed.

"Hey, you're the one still wiggling." Which was true.

She stilled.

They breathed.

John took a really, really dumb chance. "You know one of the cures for claustrophobia is distraction, right?"

Serendipitously, his dumb luck streak managed to bear him through.

Half an hour later, they both took great amusement in scarring Rodney and the crew of transporter engineers.

-fin-

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